Dearest darling Mother Nature,
What gives doll? We know you’ve been overworked and underpaid for years now, but honey, please! Wake up, smell the coffee – hell, knock back a few gallons of java if that’s what it takes! We’ll even provide you with the best espresso beans money can buy!
Why? Why, oh why, must you allow us to be held hostage by Old Man Winter? Why won’t you ask him to release his grip on us? Did we really tick you off that badly last year? Are we the misbehaving children who needed to be taught a lesson? Why must you tease us with an 80 plus degree day and a few in the mid-sixties only to be greeted a few days later with mind numbing temps in the thirties? Is it menopause my dear, they have pills for that. Lack of vitamins, we’ll send you some. Or is it something else? Just let us know and we’ll do our best to fix it.
We, the children of the fine State of Michigan, are respectfully requesting that you arise from your slumber and send Spring our way. We promise to take good care of her, nourish her, supply fresh vegetation and flora. We will love her tremendously until her sister, Summer, arrives and we will love her just as much.
All we need is for you to do your part. It’s not too much to ask. Really it isn’t! Just sweep your loving arms over our little mitten and scarf shaped state and wipe away the clouds and send the sunshine beaming down onto us.
Thanks so much for your time. Now girl, go get yourself together and get to work!
The People of Michigan